So yeah its been close to a month since I last really posted in the forums. Been a rather wild ride starting with an issue that wasn't readily apparent to me. Amazing how a person can go so long and maintain a sense of almost stability in their mind while they push away everyone that cares and literally destroy themselves from the inside out. Month of paranoia, anxiety and delusions of persecution equivalent to that in a Sci-Fi movie. No I don't believe in aliens, and I don't believe that I am being haunted, but its amazing how I have walked through the past 6 months thinking everything was a conspiracy. Everything was programmed and I was navigating the confusion of a world gone mad. But it wasn't the world…..it was me.

I just spend 4 weeks inpatient and I gotta tell you that I learned quite a bit, and it scares me that I lived the way I did for so long. A life of nothing being true and everything being permitted looking back is utter insanity. Living in my past and dwelling on all the hurt I have encountered, the shadow men rearing their ugly heads all hour of the day…..not to mention that everyone was out to get me. Everyone wanted to see me fall so they could drown me in the mud.

I'm better now, and stable. Yeah people tried to push me down when I was getting help. People still try to push me down. I'm stronger than that. Good luck. I'm stable, psychosis free for 3 weeks, and better than every. So yeah. bring it on. Come at me life. I dare you.