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May 14, 2015, 11:14 AM
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Member Since: Jul 2004
Location: transitioning to pluto
Posts: 3,461
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Quote:
Originally Posted by baseline
Mama How can I do that when he is obviously trying to distance himself. It is probably my fault because I said I was afraid of being too attached. Now he is trying to either get me to rely on myself or trying to get rid of me!!! I don't feel the same I feel shame and disappointment. The only way I will contact him is if I become a danger to myself. I am proud and stubborn and I hate that he knows how I feel about him!!!
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was it an accident that you posted this twice or fate 
I need to know where my T's clock is. I depend on knowing how much time I have left. I am not going to bring up a brand new issue if I only have 5 minutes left. I have been experimenting with different T's lately and one of the first questions I ask is "where is your clock?"
You need to be honest with him about how you feel when he does certain things. Or how you think he is making you feel. He may not even know he is affecting you. He may not be "pushing you out of the nest" It could be your brains way of telling you therapy sucks and I'm not going to do it anymore. I'm gonna quit before he does. You do not know what he is thinking until you ask.
All these thoughts you have been telling yourself could very easily be your illnesses way of getting you to stop therapy. In the past you have found therapy to be helpful. I am here to remind you of this.
You are stuck with me MF. You will get only the truth from me whether you like it or not. 
Mama is right. He may not be the right one for you. He was recommended to you because he has much experience dealing with people in your field. Maybe that is not what you need. Maybe you need someone who has much experience dealing with someone like you as a whole person.
You said this is your 1st experience with therapy. Do not give up on it too soon. I became very emotionally attached to one of my 1st therapists. So attached that I could not see I was getting worse instead of better. I gave up on therapy only to return years later in worse shape than when I started.
Okay I am done. That is my rant for the day. I hope you enjoyed it.
Okay I thought I was done. How often do you see your Doctor to discuss your meds?
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