That's called verbal and emotional abuse and in my experience some of that abuse has affected me more then the physical. Your safe person, the one who is supposed to care and protect is not supposed to kill your self esteem and confidence. Sorry you experience this. Since you are soon to be 18, I wonder what would happen if you responded with something like;"gee mom that's so nice for a daughter to hear from her mother". I feel so loved and valued when you say that. Must warn you that I am a sarcastic person when I am angry and you may not want this to be your approach. Also, tried something similar when I was about 14 when my female parent was being abusive and before I knew what was happening my male parent was beating me with a belt on my bare legs (shorts) and butt, arms. I had very large welts and for the first time in my life did not hide them under long clothing but wore them as a statement to him that he had done that to me. It was not my shame to hide, it was theirs. Also about the school assault. That is a big issue and I hope you made it known that it happened to you. It is unacceptable and schools need to take responsibility for keeping schools safe and stopping bullying and assault. I can tell you that if that happened to my 17 year old, I would be at the school with the police pressing charges and demanding that the school also discipline the perps. It is torture to be bullied at school. The adults are supposed to be making it a safe place. I am so sorry.