Here's a news flash for you, from the perspective of a woman much, much older than you are: *thinking* about something isn't the same as *doing* something.

When my former stepson was in his teens, he was so beautiful, and I loved him so much that I would sometimes look at him and wish I was his age so that I could date him. That was horribly traumatic! Every so often, I'd catch sight of him around town, or at a school function, and just catch my breath before recognizing him. It was always terrible, because -- while I wasn't really "turned on" by him -- it made me wonder if I might be a potential child molester. It got to the point that I'd get a bit uncomfortable when he'd come and cuddle with me on the sofa in front of the TV.

You know what, though? I would never have touched him that way, and I knew it. I knew that the worry was only coming from the little obsessive portion of my brain. I also knew that it was perfectly OK to see an adolescent as a sexually maturing being, and that the part that wasn't OK was any thought of *acting* on it.

What I think would help you most is to address the real problem: your obsessiveness. Are you on any sort of medication for it? Are you in any sort of therapy for it? Both of those could help you, especially the therapy. The meds can help jump start the relief, but learning how to deal with these fears will help you much more long term.

And, at 17, NOW is the time to do something about this. Otherwise, you may find yourself 40 and still worrying, still fearful, and still wondering how to help yourself.

Take good care of yourself, and I wish you the best.