You can keep writing here. I've been following you even though I'm mostly quiet and I care about your wellbeing, as we all do. If tonight toes as poorly as last night I would try to stay calm by breathing exercises.mdo something to get the negative energy out, like calisthenics in a room where your husband won't be disturbed. Sit ups, push ups, jumping jacks. Write your heart out. Whether it's on here or on paper, in a blog, something. And know it's not forever.

And of course you know that if you're in danger, go to the ER. I hope you have a better night.