I'm sorry for your struggles. Sex has been painful for me too lately - penetration just feels like an invasion, not something to be looked forward to. I've found that if I'm really good and worked up before penetration then it doesn't hurt so much and I can even enjoy myself a little. But it's hard to get worked up enough, hard for me to even orgasm these days (on my own or with my husband.) I've also gone to the doc, gotten a pelvic exam, and received a clean bill of health.

The doctor who told you "it's all in your head" is a jerk, because he/she makes it sound like this is something you should be able to control, like you're choosing to do this to yourself. What an asshole. No one would choose this. This reminds me of the "medical professionals" who tell depressed people to just "pull yourself up by your boot straps". Like, if it was that easy, of course everyone would do that and there would be no depressed people.

Anyway, I'm not sure if this helps at all, but please know you're not alone, and we're here for support. Hugs.