I'm staying safe. I had a moment. I didn't mean to bring it here. I had nowhere else to go. I do not have a therapist atm as I just moved and I didn't like my T at all. I have to find one around here.

I don't want to go into detail but basically I hurt my son in a fit of rage and it still makes me feel sick and I wish I weren't alive to hurt him. He didn't have any marks on him or anything and he forgot about it pretty quick but I haven't. I couldn't stand his tantrum and had one of my own. It's despicable.

I am a little calmer now though, just trying not to cry and think about other things. I think I'll be ok once I sleep. Maybe I'll be out of this funk. I have a job interview tomorrow for a public school. I gotta get my game face on, it would be a lot more money and less aggravation.