I've just skimmed through your previous posts on PC and noticed some themes... depression, lack of a positive self image and sense of personal accomplishment, insecurity with the growth of your marriage and your husband's values (and how you spend an unequal amount of time on doing household chores while working full time).

All those things can definitely affect your sex life even though they may not have much to do directly with sex. I would assume it's a stuggle to even put those problems out of your mind so you can try to get 'in the mood'. And then further sexual difficulties (like pain from penetration) stem from an inability to be sufficiently turned on.