thanks for your thoughts chris . I think it is a mix of both words and interpretation . I don't remember her exact words. I know it is a lot of feelings but if I cant talk about this stuff . why be there . she does think that am ok and that I am doing a lot of good things . or she calls them normal . like the party had for my husband ,or the convention I worked at , or hanging with my crafty peeps . she refuses to see how stressed I am doing these things .even when I say it directly .it is like she doesn't believe me . or believes the extent that I feel that it is all fake and will crash soon because who can keep that pretense up forever .