It is perfectly reasonable in my view to ask what happened such that her approach to the relationship has changed so noticeably. That is not "needy" as I see it.

However, in a way she preempted that by asking for time. So after giving her a reasonable amount of time, you could ask if she has come to any conclusions about where you stand. Again I don't see that as "needy", it is reasonable to want to know where you stand in a relationship and it would be UNreasonable to be expected to wait indefinitely while someone gets their act together.