Thread: Grrr...
View Single Post
 
Old May 19, 2015, 07:54 PM
cashart10's Avatar
cashart10 cashart10 is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Oct 2013
Location: KY
Posts: 3,667
Quote:
Originally Posted by Capriciousness View Post
I don't know. It just seems like a lot of your people (irl) the Pdoc and T and mom etc are focusing too much on the music thing and not enough on the other parts. The ones that you told us were concerning to you like the terror and internal agitation and paranoia. I think we all agree that the music thing is just a part of your mania. But there is a lot of other stuff going on.
My pdoc DID focus on the terror, internal agitation (in particular), and paranoia. He just assured me that cutting the anti depressant in half would solve all these problems. And he made no other changes. He didn't, I will say (at least yet) titrate my lamictal up to 800 MG. He left it at 600 MG.

Also, he said that the desire to flee is perfectly normal in mania. I said I know, but the compulsion is overwhelming, I have actually considered it. I said what happens if I do drive to Florida? Will I just drive there stay a few days and come home. He just said, "well yeah." He offered no advice to contradict my compulsion.

And, it is not that simple. My husband has said if I do that I will not have a house to come home to and papers will be drawn. A lot is at stake. I feel lost in all of this.
__________________
*****

Every finger in the room is pointing at me
I want to spit in their faces then I get afraid of what that could bring
I got a bowling ball in my stomach I got a desert in my mouth
Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now

Tori Amos ~ Crucify

Dx: Schizoaffective Disorder