Quote:
Originally Posted by CosmicRose
I was recently called a failure by an ex. He said it in a way that really hit me right in the soul. I cried for an hour after he made those comments. He said I wasn't living up to my full potential. I'm not trying to have a pity party by writing this post but I would really appreciate some kind words. His comments ring in my head as if on repeat when I'm doing the laundry, when I'm sending out resumes, when I'm about to go to sleep at night. It's triggered my depression. I can't forget his words. I can't believe a man that I was intimate with had the nerve to say that to me. That was probably the most hurtful thing anyone has said to me. My friends told me to use it as ammunition to become even more successful - but that leaves a sour taste in my mouth. I just can't believe he said that to me. Its very upsetting. I'm having trouble letting it go.
I asked this question on another website and someone responded by saying, "You are a failure. He was just stating what he saw." Tears welled up after I read that awful comment, I know I shouldn't let what others say about me affect me but its hard sometimes. .gif)
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Hi CosmicRose,
I'm sorry that you feel bad about this stuff, but it's interesting too. Have you wondered why you have such a strong reaction to what your ex said? You know, I think that being deeply hurt by something that someone says is actually a symptom of depression, even if the person saying it is a jerk and is trying to be mean and whether or not most people would be upset hearing the same thing. I think it's especially part of your depression if you keep thinking about what your ex said over and over again. Depression is very tricky. Your strong and understandable reaction to this is, I suspect, hiding the underlying problem. I have an attempt to explain it here:
http://egg.bu.edu/~youssef/SNAP_CLUB...0164151576.pdf
On the general subject of success and failure and being "ordinary", I really like what Eckart Tolle says about it:
....just in case you like that stuff too.

- vital