Lothlorien,
What's MDD?
Depression has all sorts of ways to distort our thinking. It sounds like you feel like you have failed by not paying your bills on time, and can't stand to look at your failure, which translates into your not paying your bills now.
Maybe you can find another summer camp for your son that may work out even better.
It's not your fault the meds failed. Is your doctor working on coming up with a new solution?
Hugs,
EJ
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