i think it is called projective identification.
when one projects emotions onto another that is 'projection'
when they identify (experience and act consistently) with what is projected it is called 'projective identification'.

it is meant to be a kind of 'primative' defence mechanism.

sometimes it feels like experiencing an emotion (and expressing it) is like throwing something that shouldn't be caught. it kinda comes at them suddenly though and the reflexive response is to catch.

i worry about my t catching some of my emotions. yeah, i figure that they probably go away after i leave... but i don't want him to feel anxious about spending time with me :-( and i don't want to 'trick' him into doing something / reacting in a way that he regrets.

probably i need to trust him more. i guess this kinda trust takes time 'cause i need to see how much he can cope. there are a lot of people who can't cope so i need to gently test the waters. it is hard though :-(