You're not a loser. You had a bad experience and that's all. (Although referring to her as a hoe isn't very becoming.)

I can't speak for everyone, but in my personal experience it's practically nothing like pornography. I mean, yeah, stuff goes in the same places, but pornography is all about camera angles and fantasy whereas sex for my wife and I is about that physical intimacy and closeness. It's about connecting emotionally and physically, feeling the ebb and flow of your partner's excitement and joining that wave, being part of it.

That's why to me, sex isn't "just sex". It's more about the emotionally intimate moment than just the physical act. Finding that someone who you feel very emotionally close to can make what people call "vanilla" sex very amazing.

I hope that makes sense.