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Personally, I don't have a problem with two married people having lunch together. I've had lunch with a married friend. BUT it was two friends who happen to be of the opposite sex having lunch.
What your friend's husband did was inappropriate. If all he'd done was invite you to lunch it might have been okay. He crossed the line when he kept pushing.
I like MCarter's idea. Have a response figured out ahead of time in case he ever tries this again and cut him off at the knees.
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