Quote:
Originally Posted by hankster
Imo, people are missing the point of the promises. Its the intention behind them that needs to be internalized by the client at the time the promise is made. Like clap your hands to make tinkerbell fly or whatever. Then that part of you heals, and you move on to the next developmental task. Its not - you get to eighth grade and ask for a promise from first grade to be fulfilled - we will color every day! You are past that promise now. Sorry if this sounds like blaming the client, thats not how i mean it - there is a miscommunication in what the promise meant to both parties.
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I disagree with this. Who has the same teacher from 1st grade through 8th grade unless they live in the little house on the prairie? Second - broken promises of love/devotion/care etc are the basis for most if not all divorces - do you expect people to move past that promise easily? Unless a therapist explains that it is the intention and that they are using the word promise unlike every other person except politicians, then I think it is a word they should avoid at all costs. Or perhaps just think of them as politicians and don't believe anything they say. That woman I see, when she tried to bring her dog back in after promising it would never happen again - said she thought, without checking in with me, I had softened on my stance about no dog at the appointment. Why would I have softened and why on earth would a therapist fail to ask or check before testing? Particularly after having asked me if I could let myself be reassured by her promise? And I stupidly was reassured until her breach. Then I forbade her from using the word promise.
They should not use that word