Hi sounds like the recent injustice is bringing everything back. Sorry things are so hard for you just now. Most people here know what it is like and, like me want to help you get through this. You are as valuable as anyone else and worth any effort anyone makes on this site or in 'real' life. Do you have any access to a counsellor at work or school (sorry I don't know your age) if so, it may help to use it,or help lines (like the British Samaritans) do call them if you're finding it hard to stay safe. You're worth it and they will agree that you deserve their support. Compassionate thoughts and warm wishes