I was on Celexa for 2 weeks. Prior to it I wasn't suicidal, but 2 weeks into it I had a few nights where I got VERY suicidal. My doctor explained to me that it probably wasn't the meds, or it was too soon to tell if it was from them, but more likely it was the effect of them. I had been feeling more "up" since taking them, and she said a common effect is, you feel good and then you start thinking of all your problems, and now you also have the energy to commit suicide, so once you make the realization of all your problems, combined with extra energy, that's where most suicide ideation comes from with meds.

Just in case, she stopped me on Celexa and gave me Effexor. Two weeks into Effexor, same thing, only this time I actually did attempt, not just thought. I tend to believe her "theory" more than the medicines doing something themselves to cause it because I don't know how two would do it to me in that short time.

For you, though, you were on it 5 years and it happened. I think something like that does mean it was the meds doing it to you, and if it was the meds, that should mean trying a new one with different chemicals will do something different to you. Maybe you could try something new and keep in close contact with your doctor while you are starting to monitor the suicidal effects at first, at least. Good luck (sorry this is so long lol)