I might make another doctor appointment for the ear thing soon. Although I've been finding that it's only a problem when I'm at work and I work on a campus with lots of flowers and flowering bushes and plants everywhere, so I really do wonder if it's just allergies. I always have a half sniffly nose that doesn't drip but is always a little sniffly. I also sneeze a lot. I'll look up labyrinthitis though.

I didn't think of epilepsy, but I've never had a seizure that I know of or any of the other symptoms that I know of.

I really do want to get the right diagnosis, I just don't want my pdoc to try to force more antipsychotics on me if he does diagnose me with sza, because I feel stable and fine right now (even with the hallucinations) and am trying to lose all of the weight that APs have put on me over the past few years since I started meds.

I really need to look for another pdoc, because mine is so bad. I realized yesterday that I forgot to even make my next appointment with him. I was crying because of what he did to me last appointment so I completely forgot to set an appointment at the front desk. I emailed him yesterday and told him that it doesn't make sense to meet until after I get a brain scan, so if he will refer me to get a brainscan (that's covered by my insurance) I will go do it and then when the results have been interpreted I will meet with him again one last time to sort out the diagnosis thing, and then I will ask him for several months of refills on all of my meds and then get on a waiting list to see someone better in the county I'm going to move to in a few months. I haven't even started looking for someone new yet though because I've been so swamped with school and work (and the stress from both being really chaotic and difficult right now).

Atypical, your psychosis started at 14? I guess I'm lucky that mine didn't start setting in until around age 20, and it hasn't even been that bad other than a couple of mood episode related incidents, and 3 marijuana related FULL BLOWN psychotic episodes during college where I didn't even know what my body was doing and have no memory of what really happened other than what people told me I did, (i.e. speak in total word salad, act as though I was blind, (I really couldn't see the world through my own eyes, I thought I was seeing alternate dimensions and would never go back to the real world again) and I just remember thinking that the only way to communicate messages to my friends in the real world to get them to save me was to catch messages of messenger owl's legs and interpret the code written on them, and then write in the code which I didn't even understand (without a pen or paper) and then catch the owls again and tie the messages to to their legs to send to the real world. Needless to say I wasn't communicating coherently at all in the real world.) I don't touch the stuff anymore. I sometimes wonder if smoking those 3 times maybe partially triggered what I have now, or exacerbated what I already have. I'm pretty sure I had hallucinations before smoking weed though, so maybe not. Plus I haven't smoked in years and I'm still hallucinating on a near daily basis. Last night I heard cat scratches and desperate (but quiet) meows against my bedroom door. I don't have any pets. Again, didn't bother me, but I didn't exactly sleep last night either. I'm on day 3 without sleep, which has me kind of worried I'm headed back into a mood episode. No real other symptoms yet except overspending, but I always do that when I feel like I have some extra money (even though I really don't). I just suck with money. At least that's my rationalization. No euphoria or increased goal directed activity or pressured speech or anything like that. The only other thing I can think of is racing thoughts, but I always get those when I can't sleep. That's been going on my whole life. I think the reason I haven't been sleeping is one of the days I had a test the next day and was worried about it, one of the days I forgot to take my geodon, and last night I forgot to take my ambien. I remembered at like 4am when I was still laying there, but I had to get up at 5am, so I didn't take it. Now I'm just rambling. That's enough of that.

What are your psychotic symptoms like Atypical? Do you still get them regularly even on meds? What meds are you on? I'm honestly not sure what the difference in treatment between bipolar and schizoaffective is other than probably a larger dose of an AP, or multiple APs, neither of which I want unless I am in an episode and really need it, but we'll see what happens.