Thank you for caring.Things were going better for me though but losing a family member who you were close to all your life is pretty hard... He was more than a uncle he was like a second father to me the way he treated me and my cousins. It kind of messed me up because it happened so fast! We were all in the hospital there for him the doctors had some hope then out of nowhere he started bleeding eternally and going through massive organ failure the heart pump started to malfunction and was pumping dead blood cells in with the healthy it was a huge terrible mess and the only thing keeping him alive were machines they had to let the machines go and let him go because he was no longer responding. It's still hard to talk about it... I think the fear the sadness and the worry are what sent me back over the edge I couldn't handle all that stress I had a breakdown I kicked a wall so hard it tore a hole in my shoe I was on the floor screaming with my cousins who were also on the floor crying it was all so emotional... I'm just now recovering I can only hope I'll fully recover again soon. Just have to build myself up again.