I mentioned in my 'I'm such a downer' post of how I thought my bipolar
Is structured- I realized I was wrong. I used to have more irritability and that slowly disappointing to more feelings of sadness. I used to be more irritable and then some days I would just wake up angry- I would try to have a bunch of chocolate-now I'm afraid that I'll have more days where I randomly wake up tearful and just have low level depression ( dysthymia) in between these build ups.
Part of me wonders if this is the norm. I used to be more melancholic as a child, and perhaps it's taken a few years to return to normal- the whole irritability thing might just be my brain dealing with no more substances. I guess only time will tell. . . At least I got some mangos and grapefruit in case I need them.