I'm really afraid to say this but ever since I was little I have always gotten these feelings off and on. It was always a feeling of being extremely embarrassed. Almost like I am embarrassed of my life and just existing. I'm embarrassed that people know me. It's like I wish my parents had a different kid and that I never existed. As I get older I don't have these feelings as much but they still come back every now and then. I feel like I am the only one who feels like this and gets these feelings. I am too afraid to tell anyone but it just makes me so upset and just feel awful. Like I want to be "perfect". I know no one is perfect but I feel like if I do something wrong or if I said something wrong, I try to act like I am right because I get too embarrassed to be wrong. I know everyone is wrong sometimes so I don't know why I feel like this. Basically I'm embarrassed to be living. I know it's an awful thing to say but that's how I feel and how I have always felt.