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Old May 28, 2015, 07:23 PM
Anonymous50006
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Quote:
Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006 View Post
completely understand this. I think for me at least it has to do with how I interact in groups. I do not interject myself easily into group conversation and like you, I end up waiting for others to talk about things that I too am interested in, and many times that never happens. I'm sorry I know it's hard. I wish I had a solution other than being in groups where their highest interests are ones I can relate to.

I typically shy away from groups of people IRL because of this.

I'm sorry this isn't advice but I understand completely and empathize.
The thing is…I really should relate to people more than I do. I mean, I'm a musician and I spend a lot of time around other musicians…shouldn't I have enough in common? I guess not…I never worked on a cruise ship and that's a popular topic. I'm usually around musicians that specialize in jazz and so know everything there is to know and that's a genre I'm trying to branch into (so I don't know that much yet). I sort of feel like maybe I'm not a "real" musician since I don't seem to relate at all to most of them which makes my life difficult considering you usually only get gigs through your friends/acquaintances so if I don't belong anywhere, I might have to change careers.

What really annoys me is that often when these things happen, my boyfriend is also there. He is aware I have issues socializing and has expressed desire to make sure I don't feel left out. And yet, I seem to have an easier time not being ignored by other people if he's not there. I'm not sure how to mention this without upsetting him…at least the part about me feeling left out last night when everyone (all guys) in the group we were out with last night paired off with each other and I was left out. I have a feeling that I'm just considered just a significant other and not as my own unique person, if that makes sense.