I'm not sure what I want out of this post except maybe some reasurrance that I'm not out of my mind. I've struggled with major clinical depression all my life and receently went in-patient at a psych hospital to get help and my medications sorted out. I shared at a meeting that when I was in the hospital reading the big book and meditation had really helped me keep calm and that I felt it had streengthend my link with my higher power. But after the meeting was over a woman, who I generally really respect and who goes to almost all of the same meetings as me came up and asked what I'd been in for. I said depression and she launched into a lecture about how when she got down she just went to more meetings and they cleared her mind and was I praying enough because I had to get away from the "poison" of medications from the Dr.'s. this isn't the first time I've run into anti psych messages in AA - just the most overt. I don't want to compare degrees of depression but for me it means planning suicide. That hospitalization helped me more than anythign else has and I probably wouldn't be alive without my meds. but that doesn't mean I'm not committed to AA in my recovery fromm alcohol. I just don't want to feel that they have to be two mutually exclusive parts of my life..

--splitimage