Everything is unraveling and I feel like the help Im asking for does not exist. Been in the hospital inpatient because of alters twice in maybe 10 days for serious self and selves destructive plans. Im sure you can imagine how swimmingly that went. They literally didnt even spell my disorder right. Losing time, but more importantly, information, that i wasnt before, and its terrifying. Really dont know what to do anymore. Nothing seems to be helping. Ive stopped trying so hard to hide the DID because its impossible now. Alters i pushed back before are now all "notice me!!". Noticing how much the inner house affects real life. I had a butler in the house for months, but thought he was just imaginary. Is not. Crying all of the time, hearing voices threatening to make me black out, bad sleep, panic attacks. When is anything going to get better? Im getting all of the help I can.