Hi spiroll. Welcome to Psych Central(PC). I am so sorry you are suffering from what seems like might be called caregiver fatigue. I know it is a difficult situation and you are the parent but one risk of spending too much time on AJ and not enough time on you is burnout.

As far as specific advice for AJ, having a therapist that is sympathetic but not an advocate for being gay could be a help. You mention diet, I find a high protein low carb diet helps me stabilize the emotional rollercoaster.

People here at PC may also have a therapist to talk things out for themselves as well as for the person they are caregiving.

Besides being an active participant in helping oneself at Psych Cental, many people also help support each other by replying to other people's posts. Many people who are actively involved in Psych Central find it helps take them out of their own problems to develop empathy for others. And their problems are more manageable the more they help others.

Glad you are joining us here. Some people find the forums give them the compassion and empathy they seek. http://forums.psychcentral.com

Please feel free to private message me or any of the Community Liaisons by left clicking on the name in blue to the left of their post) for questions or just to share.