Hello,

I have been working with a wonderful therapist for the better part of the past 3 years. We have done a great deal of work in that time, but not really hitting the "core" of my issues (complex trauma as a child that lasted for years) until more recently. However, I am having a terribly difficult time actually working through the trauma. (Just a little background - emotions were NOT okay to share with anyone when I was a child and I still have a terribly difficult time allowing people to see that I, in fact, have emotions.)

I feel as though I want to work through it, but as soon as I get into the therapy room, my anxiety level goes completely out of control. I feel like I'm not in control of myself anymore and I'm not really able to use any coping skills (deep breathing, grounding techniques) to regulate myself. My therapist is always very patient and never pushes me to go beyond where I'm ready, but I'm getting frustrated. I'm paying a lot of money to go every week and we are barely able to talk about anything because we can't seem to get the anxiety under control enough so that I can have coherent thoughts and participate in a conversation.

Does anyone have any ideas or tips of things that have worked for them? I really feel like my therapist has tried a variety of things to help me out (she's tried giving me time and space, guiding me in grounding activities, changing the topic completely), but my body just isn't cooperating. I get in there and I feel like I'm a traumatized 2 year-old again...

Thank you, Luisa