Hi everyone--I just wanted to give a quick update on my situation.

Last week, I dropped by his house unannounced...I was suspicious...I found him having dinner on his deck with a woman. I hung around (yes, felt a little stalkerish) and eventually saw him passionately kiss her goodnight.

When I confronted him, first he pretended not to know what I was talking about and denied having anyone at his house. Then he claimed it was not a passionate kiss and it meant nothing. (I know what I saw, and it WAS a passionate kiss, with--I came to find out--a woman he used to live with.) Then he asked if I was going to make a big deal of it and he called me a big baby. Oh yes he did.

He went on to get mad at me for dropping by his house unannounced and for spying on him. Isn't that a narcissistic trait--to place blame on anyone but themselves?

I told him I would take the high road and he could email his family (and bcc me) and tell them he was breaking up with me. If he didn't, I would email them and tell them exactly why I was no longer going to be his caretaker. I didn't hear anything from him for the rest of that night, the entire next day, and into the following day. I assumed he wasn't going to write to his family, so I did, briefly--very briefly--telling them why I would no longer be a part of his recovery.
I received lovely messages from his two daughters. They totally understood and were supportive of me. One of the daughters actually told me she'd found out about his texting other women and had a conversation about it with him, telling him he shouldn't be doing that when he was dating me.

I didn't hear from the rest of his family, but I copied him on the email, and he blasted me, saying, "I was planning on taking the high road but you instead chose to play in the trenches."

And: "This communique to my family, is exactly what I DIDNT need right now....thanks for your purported care and concern. Truly, I never expected you to stoop to this level, but I misjudged I guess."

I am hurting, but I know I did the right thing. I SO appreciate your all's comments and support. You helped me tremendously!