So this past weekend, we had to take my 1 y.o. son to the hospital. When I got home from work he was acting weird. He usually sleeps around the time I get home so I wasn't completely alarmed at first. After I tried to nap with him for an hr or so my boyfriend had gone to his job. My son hadn't fallen asleep and was still aciting strange. So I ran through what every normal parent would, it was a hot day so I didn't know if maybe he was dehydrated. I asked my boyfriend if he had regular diapers, I took his temp, I gave him water. All appeared normal. So I drew a bath to see how he reacted and he usually loves it, but it looked like he was so out of it.I called my boyfriend and we took him to the hospital. I explained the situation to the doctors. They took their time, which got me really aggravated, because part of the problem was that he was breathing weird.

Later on after they tried a few things, they gave him steroids, epinephrine and something else, and they didn't work they transferred him to a different hospital about an hour away and by this time they had a little tube of oxygen I had to keep by his mouth and nose. I was in the back of the ambulance with him and boyfriend up front. He wasn't getting any better so they put gave him an iv, put oxygen tube in his nose, still had the other medicated oxygen we had to keep by his mouth, drew blood, etc. So I'm freaking out by this time and the nurse reassured us that it was really severe croup. So I was relieved that we were in a pediatric hospital and they knew it was something they could treat. A few hours later he still had made no progress so we got transferred to the pediatric icu.

From then on every thing got so much worse. His vitals were fine and he had finally fallen asleep at about 2 that following morning. They took a urine sample from him and that next morning around 8 informed us that they had found suboxone in his system. I was mortified and scared and angry and shocked all at once. My boyfriend admitted he was addicted to suboxone and had been struggling for a long timw.he never meant to have it around him, and he didn't even think it was a possibility he could have gotten ahold of any.

So from here cps and dcf were notified. We spoke with them and they came up with a safety plan. My son was allowed to go home with me after he was back to his normal self. But my boyfriend isn't allowed in the house, or to visit unless supervised and first checked for drugs. We had one home visit while I was still in the hospital with my son. And I have another on wednesday. I am adhering to everything they asked but I have never dealt with these people before and I have nothing to hide, the only thing I do is smoke cigarettes. But I'm so nervous. My boyfriend has been in contact with me and has since gone into outpatient treatment so he can still keep his job. But no one is happy with him obviouslly, and he's been having to sleep in the car away from the house. This whole thing has got me going crazy. My family fell apart right before my eyes. I have no one from my side of the family. So his sister has been helping babysit while I work.

My son almost died, I lost my boyfriend, I lost my family, I lost trust, I lost feelings. And everyone has been going nuts over the dirty details of the story and they act like I have a disease and won't talk to me, but ask other people. Somehow it got around that my boyfriend was a junkie, and I know what suboxone is for, but he has never ever shot up or done opiates. He started on suboxone because his cousin had done it. Etc. So I'm dealing with that. And his sister has been helping me out so much but she holds my son and won't put him down all day. And we just broke him of the habit of having to fall asleep on us and got him used to the pack and play and sleeping in his crib. Now on top of everything, ever since I've gone back to work he won't sleep in his crib and freaks out if he gets put down. I just want it all to stop and go away.