I just talked with my xhusband and he mentioned his father who past away 8 months ago, that he felt sad and how difficult it is to lose.

I sometimes feel that my xhusband forgets I have both lost my brother and mother. My brother shot himself at age 18 at my grand parents house and my mother had schizophrenia and was under care, she died suddenly one day of an aneruisme too young. I didnt get to say goodbye to any of them.

I know so well how painful it is to lose a family member and I feel for my xhusbands pain.

Today it triggered me because I hear him say ( again ) how difficult it is and its said in a way that I dont know how difficult it is, when I DO know. It triggered me and my pain over my own lost family members, my own pain and grief and I started shake inside when it sounds like I dont know how difficult it is.

The grief will not vanish no matter its a year ago or 30 years ago or 8 years ago.

I reacted and said I DO know how difficult it is and told him I feel he forgets I have lost family members in horrible way. I said I am sorry for bringing up my own pain and my own family members as it was my xhusbands grief and feelings that were talked about.

I feel guilt for bringing up my own family members and not just listen to his pain. Its just that its hard when someone speaks as if you have not lost someone and dont know how difficult it is when I have.

Was I wrong to mention my own grief and pain?