After going undiagnosed for most of my life, at age 48 after starting mood stabilizers I feel like I'm just starting to figure out the "real" me. Being stable for any amount of time is a brand new feeling. To not be constantly ruled by my emotions, to carry out a thought without being bombarded by anxiety and fear, to be around men socially and not inappropriately crave sex with them...all new. This Bipolar I'm learning is truly capable of altering identities, and it's so frustrating that others usually cannot really understand, especially with BipolarII, when it can be so subtle and yet so destructive. I have to be forever vigilant to maintain "me", people around me typically have no idea of my daily battle. You are not alone.