Interesting post, Ingrid. During my 20 year marriage, I was a virtual "slave" when not earning income. I could not spend any money without his permission, and that always involved debate, in which I lost. I knew other women like me, staying home, taking care of a child in infancy, who had credit cards and money to spend freely, but not me! I began earning money doing signwork and freelance artwork, also teaching painting classes, just to have some meager spending money of my own, and you can bet I set it up under a separate checking account of my own. After my daughter was older, in elementary school, I achieved my teacher certification and became a middle school art teacher, again maintaining my own money. I often marvel at women my age who acquiese to the husbands who control the money...I guess because of my conditioning while married, I can't abide it, and even feel sorry for them!
Patty