My mother's favorite line is "That's not how I remember it." Her other go to is "The women in our family are just volatile. It's just how it is and always will be. You can't fight nature." Then she shrugs and says people are moody and to get over it.

When I was first diagnosed she threw a fit; she didn't give this to me it wasn't her fault and the doctors were all quacks. It was just a BS diagnosis to make her look like a bad mom. Sometimes now she seems supportive but waffles back and forth between the two reactions. Just depends on her mood and if she's on an even keel at the time.

I don't know about your mom but mine will be 61 in July. Her symptoms have gotten much better with age. She does not cycle nearly as rapidly OR as extremely as she did when she was younger. My Pdoc says that for a lot of bipolar people symptoms lessen as they get older. Hoping it's true.

So sorry for what you went through and that you still have anxiety from it. Some wounds last longer than others and just suck the big one.