It can be a challenge to sleep after having a day of triggers. Keep in mind the brain is lost in being able to find a way to process it to begin with, so a day of remembering can mean a night of the brain still not knowing how to process it, which is what the brain does while we sleep.

It is a tough go when it comes to working through a challenge in therapy, it's exhausting in a way the average person doesn't understand too.

When a trauma takes place where the individual is overwhelmed with emotional confusion, it is the left side of the brain that is challenged because that is the part that we use to reason and discuss and problem solve and has a lot of language as well as doing tasks and keeping with the now. So, the right side of the brain where all the emotions are is working overtime where the left side gets too overwhelmed.

See, what you just talked about is all the emotional challenges that these BD's are bring up for you. You have not figured out "how" to get past these days in a productive way, too much "emotional challenge" is there still.

It takes time to slowly get through these days where you can celebrate the positives of that individual that becomes a ritual that slowly steps away from the more confusing/disturbing emotional challenges.

One thing that can be helpful is grief counseling, mourning takes time to work through in this challenge. I also think you need some comforting hugs too because what does help a lot is the oxytocin that is received by physical comforting.

There should be a specific message therapy that is offered for that, it really is amazing how much that helps.