And some thing just aren't going to happen, virtually nobody gets their ideal relationship. I have always had fantasies about being dominated by a woman. Ex-wife well she was never into sex at all let alone anything non vanilla. My girlfriend is VERY open minded but like me is on the submissive side. So while things are very good they aren't the fantasy that I would like. But an OK reality is better than a great fantasy, because it's real. Maybe you should reset your goal to just a date, never can tell where it might end.