I've been reading a number of blogs, advice sites and other resources and they all say that you should start dating again, after the death of a spouse, when you feel you are ready.

That is all good and well, but I'm running into an issue that the time I feel I should wait and what the rest of society thinks, appears to be worlds apart.

I admit that it's only been just over three months and I'm NOT ready to get involved with someone again. Still sorting out my thoughts and my feelings for my departed wife are still too strong to set aside, to focus on someone else.

However whenever I talk with anybody about the idea of dating I get the usual...

"What? She's only just past. You shouldn't be dating yet!"

... or something to that effect.

Don't want to put myself on a schedule, but I think by the end of this year I should be in a better place to consider a relationship. However everybody else thinks I should be waiting at least 2 to 3 years before I start.

So the problem is, if I do start dating by years end, every prospect will probably feed me the same "you should wait" line. Which will lead to rejection, disappointment, depression and the fracturing of my already fragile psyche. I really want to avoid this, but if I have to wait it out until society thinks it acceptable for me to date, then so be it.

But... how long IS that time?

Is the 2 to 3 years I'm being told over and over again, accurate?