Quote:
Originally Posted by I.Am.The.End.
There's a reason that I prefer smaller groups of people or one on one…then I don't get left out an ignored. I just don't understand why a group of people knowing that I'm there choose to talk about (and only talk about) something they have in common that I don't relate to. Or how if there's an odd number of people, the other people in the group will pair off and I'm left to sit there and I guess listen to see if I can insert myself into the conversation or something. And if I can't insert myself into the conversation, I guess I just sit there. I just don't understand why this always happens? I guess I should only be around one person at a time so they can't completely ignore me.
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This happens to me
every time I am in a group. My friends will talk about video games, films, or books I've never heard of; play board or card games I am uncomfortable with or uninterested in; and reminisce about experiences I was never a part of. Meanwhile, I sit quietly and observe their conversations with patience, offering an occasional word if the moment permits.
After several hours of this dynamic, I often wonder why I hung out in the first place.
I don't believe the people we spend time with do this purposefully or with cruel intent. They simply get caught up in their conversations. In my experience,
I am the one who chooses to be quiet in these situations, for I am inherently timid and feel I have little to offer in regard to their conversation. My friends are very interested in video games and board games, while I am not. This makes it hard for them to connect with me, but it doesn't mean they don't like me.
I've learnt over the last four or five years that I enjoy (and do better in) one-on-one conversations, and I schedule time with my friends accordingly. This way, I can avoid the discomfort that group conversations bring.
If I
do decide to hang out with a group of friends, I usually spend a majority of the time beside someone I am especially close with, so that I am not left out.