There is nothing worse than the blindside. . .

I'm so sorry for you. I'm so sorry for her.

What about the pillow? Is it something you hold onto during session or look at while you speak? Why not ask? If it will comfort you while she's gone and help you stay connected, I think it would be worth asking for. And I'm sure she knows how hard it will be for you while she's away.

I don't think you're selfish at all -- you are genuinely concerned for her and of course you're going to miss her. Is there something you can do for her that you can share that you'll be doing that shows a sense of connection i.e., that you care for her but that you are going to miss her too? If you have some sort of spiritual practice, you could say that you will say prayers for her or you could light a candle for her each day. I've written to my T while he's away -- I didn't give it to him, but I did write every day as a way to stay connected. He has also given me things to hold onto of his while he's away.

I really feel for your predicament, and I'll send healing thoughts the way of you and and your T.

Take care.