Lady Lindsey, I'm not quite sure why the hospital seems so dreadful. I was in and out of the two different psych wards in my town, about 21 times in a decade. They were mainly just a place to crash when I got such anxiety i couldn't endure it. Meds didn't help. The hospital stay didn't help much except to get myself together again. There used to be a pride thing about it, but I got over that.
The places and staff were kind of like staying at a resort, actually, except I was too mentally sick to enjoy it. It never was a problem getting discharged, as I'm clever and learned what to say to get discharged. I did have horses, cats, and dogs at home, but husband took care of them. Now I'm alone and no horses, but I would worry about my cats.
When a psychiatrist at the hospital explained inner child to me I was able to get hold of my panic episodes and just do out-patient therapy. I'm DID, too, and I know it isn't easy.
I don't mean to put any pressure on you...forgive me if I seem too nosey.