It seems like, since high school ended, you and this girl have only spoken a few times, after accidentally running into one another. If that's true, then you really don't know her very well anymore and you have no basis for deciding that she has a fear of intimacy or that she wants a white picket fence or that she chooses the wrong guys. Even if that is what other people have told you or what it seems like on facebook, unless you know her very well, those are all just rumors or assumptions. Honestly, it's a pretty condescending way to think about her. You have created an image of her in your head where you think she is fragile and needs your protection-- but that just isn't reality. If she wanted to see you, then she would make plans with you. Maybe she is just being polite when she runs into you. Or, maybe she is being genuine in the moment but already has a busy life and doesn't have the extra time or energy. You are totally free to follow up with her and ask to see her in person. But if she says no, that doesn't necessarily mean she is afraid of intimacy. I mean, it could mean that-- but there are dozens of other options as well. it could mean she isn't interested.