I'm torn about accepting the dress.

I was distraught when she offered, and at the time, I cried that I'd rather have more time with her than clothes.

But.... really, I've already paid for plenty of time, I'm having three sessions this week (will be away most of next week) and... the idea of accepting her caring and having something tangible from her... well.... it's really growing on me. Something... to help make that connected moment last.

I wrote her an email.... I told her some things, appreciative, and how much it meant to me... and asked her if she was alright with me accepting.

What do you all think?

Part of me says... "Just take it." Not to be greedy, but.... to validate the caring, to validate that I'm worth it, to have something... tangible. I bought myself a shawl, a while back, silvery and soft and long enough to wrap all the way up in. It was part of a visualization exercise I did with my T. I imagined a dorm room, where I could study at college, like a bee hive of learning, orderly and calm and fulfilling.

And in it, I visualized a silver shawl hanging from the wall.

And then, because I could not have the dorm experience anymore... I found a woman who wove shawls on Etsy, and I bought this one for myself. It's very special and comforting to me.

And.... to think of having something from her...

But on the other hand... there's the part that says...

Don't take advantage.
Don't be aggressive (by writing her)
Just let the moment go, take in the caring without needing the actual item

But... I don't even get to see my T in person, and sometimes I'd really like to... so... it would be nice to have something...