I hate that nobody knows how to handle it. When I went on leave from work it was actually for gyn surgery. I had to go off a little early because I was in too much pain to work any more and needed stronger pain meds I couldn't take and drive (and I worked in home health so driving was all I did). So I was off 2 weeks, had surgery and was supposed to be back 3 weeks later. Instead I was in the hospital. We kept trying to get me well enough to go back and failing. I finally tried to go back in November and work and I agreed I wasn't ready and needed more time. Totally humbling. About a month later I realized I wasn't going back and then began months of suicidal hell trying to cope with that.

While I worked for that place and it was a FABULOUS place to work other people were off work and there were always get well cards and updates on how they were doing in weekly meetings. I never got a card or anything from work at all. My former boss sent me a few cards last year while I was recovering from surgery which was sweet of her but I was so hurt that when I was out nobody seemed to care. I know it was them trying to be respectful but it turned into them seeming to ignore me and making me feel not valuable. Even if they didn't want to say I was having gyn surgery they could have just left it at "Jen is having surgery, here's a card" and that would have been enough. I just reminded of this because there was a facebook post from the people from that job showing their day of support for someone just diagnosed with breast cancer. And while I didn't have cancer and didn't need a party a card would have done so much good....