I am sorry your parents hurt you again. I found my parents can always reach me. The other day my Mom phoned for my birthday and talked to me. She is an alcoholic and has spent the last twenty seven years telling all my relatives what an evil heartless daughter I am who ruined any chance of her happiness and made her an alcoholic. She stopped talking to me for years but managed to convey her poison through family members. So we finally had a nice conversation and that is what hurt the most - that she is incapable of giving real love and warmth. I really would have like to be surrounded by love and hugs - and this was my crime, that I always dreamed they would come if I just asked the right way. I must say I am now having more success asking other people than my Mom for warmth and hugs.