What my T has encouraged me to do is to take care of myself in ways that do not harm me.

For example, I've been skipping meals because I'm avoiding my parents. So, I've been trying to eat a little with them around (difficult), or eating after they've left the dining table, or eating out.

You don't have to tell them the truth about you avoiding them. You can say you're just busy or stressed.

I treat them cordially, and cite work stress as a plausible reason for minimizing time around them - because that's my personal comfort level.

You'll find your own comfort level.

I know I don't want them to feel I'm behaving oddly for complex reasons I'm not sure about. Like I suspect they'll just brush off my resentment and hurt if I told them the truth about why I avoid them