Quote:
Originally Posted by mike1127
I have internal splitting due to early trauma, but I have never thought of myself as DID nor have I received that diagnosis. I have a stable ego (conscious) self and don't have amnesia. But I can dialogue with my parts. I can ask a question and sense part of me answering, and I have gotten to know many parts clearly.
Here's my struggle. I have always wanted to be a composer of classical music since being a child. I heard music in my imagination as a child, but I could never stabilize my attention on it long enough to write it down. Then later I lost the music in my imagination. I can't hear music any more in my imagination, not even just remembering music I've heard before. I have actually done a lot of study of music now and I can compose with the help of a piano or computer (to help me hear the sound) but it's not very fun compared to using my imagination (and not very good either). Every once in a while I get a little hint of music, or dream that I'm hearing music.
What I wonder is whether the function of imagining sound split off into a sub-part. Maybe someday I can get it back if I reunite my psyche. Has anyone had any experience like that?
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here in my location if someone imagines something it does not split off into other parts of self, ....Unless that person purposely imagines that thing is split off into a sub part in essence an imaginary friend. Which is different than having a dissociative problem, (in order for something to be called a dissociative problem, the problem can not be an imaginary one, or better explained by other mental problems like hallucinations, delusions, psychosis, medication.....)
in general the way imagination works is all you need to do to gain back something you have imagined away is to imagine it back, Im guessing for some reason you and your brain really doesnt want that sound back....(fear, medication, not really wanting the sound back...in general there are many reasons why someone would have trouble imagining something)
my suggestion is contact your treatment providers, maybe the solution is as simple as changing your medications. some anti depressants/anti psychotics are specially formulated so that things like hallucinations, delusions (which sometimes can be because of someone imagining things that are not real) dont happen.