Quote:
Originally Posted by growlycat
I'm wondering if his refusal to reassure has more to do with not reinforcing anxiety rather than transference.
I'm finding that my CBT T does not reassure, seems to avoid it. Reading up on anxiety and OCD (I'm not OCD) it seems that therapists feel that reassurance makes these things worse. I'm trying to view it not as rejection but a therapeutic tactic.
I found this:
The Problem with Reassurance
So why is reassurance such a big deal? To put it in clinical terms, when an individual seeks reassurance, they reinforce that they are unable to tolerate the discomfort of the uncertainty they are experiencing. At the same time, they reinforce that the best way to alleviate the discomfort of that uncertainty is to compulsively seek reassurance.
Concurrently, reassurance as a behavior sends the message to the brain that whatever unwanted thought set these events into motion must be terribly significant. “If he goes through all of this just to know for sure, then this thought must be really important!”
Finally, reassurance is addictive. If reassurance were a substance, it would be considered right up there with crack cocaine. One is never enough, a few makes you want more, tolerance is constantly on the rise, and withdrawal hurts. In other words, people with OCD and related conditions who compulsively seek reassurance get a quick fix, but actually worsen their discomfort in the long term.
Reassurance Seeking in OCD and Anxiety | OCD Center of Los Angeles |
Just an opinion here: I'm not terribly familiar with OCD and it's treatments but I've never read anything like this. Perhaps some people can never be satisfied because of various issues, and perhaps someone with OCD would feel the need to obsessively seek out that "Do you like me?" reminder from someone the way the need to 'check the stove' (stereotypical example) but ... is basic affirmation a drug? Really?
I'm side-eyeing this whole concept of comparing basic reassurance —*an instinctive need — with something so taboo as drugs. There must be better ways to address the need without wronging it.