guilloche Oh no! Winterglen, this makes me so sad. It sounds like you may have been surrounded by really unkind, unloving people who were useless in helping you see the beauty and value that you bring into the world. I'd be willing to bet money that you were not in any way stupid, that you had a lot to offer, but that you were surrounded by really dumb grown-ups who didn't do a good job of validating your strengths.

Good points, not much too add except that I often felt like this when I was younger. For me it came from being pretty much ignored as a child, (aside from being told what a burden/tiresome nusance I was) I was never taught anything, which meant as I got older I lacked common sense, initative and confidence. To deny basic skills to a child causes 'infanalisation'. Oh, and if I did try to do anything it got ridiculed and rubbished, I was made to feel silly and small.
No wonder self esteem was nil.

I just never learnt how to 'be'.