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Old Jun 11, 2015, 05:10 PM
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Rose76 Rose76 is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 12,851
I think you've made the right choice in not "liking" his comments on facebook. It is consistent with what you told him were your intentions. To the extent that this guy has bipolar issues, you being consistent just becomes that much more important.

You may be right about it being unrealistic to think that you and he are going to have much of a friendship going forward. Telling you that you look beautiful is not just a kind comment. His remark is romantic, which is why it makes you uncomfortable. You know he wants to reignite the romance, so I would advise making no response to comments like that. The month of no contact was, IMO, a very good idea to set the tone for transitioning out of a romantic involvement.

I don't think too many guys are much interested in being "buddies" with a girl who has decided to reject their romantic interest. You don't have to be enemies. So, alternatively, I guess it would be fine for you to tell him that you still consider yourself his friend . . . but you're not going to want to be all that close of a friend. So I wouldn't even throw around the term, friend, too much. Do you really want him to have ideas about hanging out with you after the month of no contact is over?

Eventually, you will become romantically involved with someone else. You'll probably talk about that with your real friends. Do you see yourself having chit chat with your ex about future guys you become interested in? You see how it gets to be inappropriate . . . and how he can't really be part of your inner circle?

I don't blame a guy for trying. He'ld like you to eventually take him back, so he's hanging on hoping to see that happen one day. If you know it's not a possibility, then best to keep your distance, not with hostility, but firmly . . . consistently.
Thanks for this!
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