They don't give you benzos! What *****es!

Raspberry so many thoughts came into my head reading all of your words.

Yeah I fake it. I have kids. I have to fake it 24/7.

Sometimes faking it is all we have

But it scrapes me raw to fake it. Sometimes I feel like it takes so much energy to hold it together and seem normal and fake it that I have nothing left to fight with which is why I also allow myself to grab chances to lie in the dark and give in to the depression.

The depression you are experiencing is a particularly hellish kind and I've been there and my heart truly goes out right to you.

Don't apologize for ranting and rambling. That is what we are here for. I know we have fun on this forum but this is a Bipolar forum not an English proper tea time forum. We keep it REAL. Ha! Really real.

Ditto to what Christina said.

Kick claw fight!